me, whenever i chime in on my players discussion to remind them of something or offer advice: hey y’all, god here

absolutelybatty:

If you had to get a tattoo from the last show you watched, what would it be?

sufficientlylargen:

anapplepie:

when programs fucking autocorrect <3 to ❤️ and :) to 😃,,,, do you have any idea what you’ve just done?? what you just fucking destroyed ?

A) It’s irritating when systems turn lovely ascii art into crude little pictograms, and

😎 It’s even more frustrating when you weren’t actually trying to make an emoji.

catchymemes:

alphabetcompletionist:

spunchthegoblin:

alphabetcompletionist:

spunchthegoblin:

kiwi b ird held so gen tle and sweet . wonderful .

AB DEFGHI KL NO RSTU W

17/26

i dont think this bird even knows the alphabet .

i will teach her

podcastwizard:

dnd jokes that will always be funny no matter what your dm tells you

• “jesus christ” “who’s that”
• “this is just like (tv show/movie)” “that’s my favorite play”
• referring to famous musicians or actors from the real world as “bards”
• adding the word “fantasy” in front of modern things (i pull out my Fantasy iPhone and open Fantasy Tinder)
• “how hurt are you” “on a scale of one to twenty-eight i’d say i’m at about a nine.”

feel free to add more

mistmarauder:

How do you take your eggs?

Scrambled

Sunny Side Up

Over Easy

Hard Boiled

Soft Boiled

Poached

Omelette

Other

1eos:

the glorification of your 20s and fear of anything else has got to stop. mainly bc your 20s is quite literally the worst decade of your life the idea that ppl think you peak at 25 has me so sad for them

fartgallery:

cause of death: tried to organize an activity with more than 2 friends at once past the age of 25

kamlo:

kamlo:

kamlo:

gonna write my own overly specific and seemingly arbitrary do not interact

ok here it is DO NOT INTERACT:

people who wear turtlenecks, people who like the taste of cows milk, apple music users, psych majors, history nerds, gifted kids, adult emos, if you have healthy hair, if you have an eyebrow piercing, aries suns with cancer moons, people who got their drivers license at 16, anyone who follows adam ellis, people without asthma, candle haters, flatsound fans, white men who like marvel, you call yourself a weeb, your name starts with e, white people who call themselves evil, if you had a dear evan hansen phase, theatre majors, ohio state students, people who sleep without stuffed animals, if youve watched the simpsons by choice, people who put their real first name in the uquiz name box, if you understand how a car engine works, you have a professionally cut and/or dyed mohawk, iron man kinnies, people who are good at geography

reblog with how many times i canceled you :)

yummyinmytumbly:

Crochet versions of loaded toasts by Maria Skog

steves-babysitter:

But seriously….when Ken said “They’re staring at me and there’s no violent undertones” while smiling and Barbie says “They’re staring at me too and there’s definitely violent undertones” while worried were the realest moments in that movie.

aeonthedimensionalgirl:

my absolutely favorite thing about the barbie movie is that at no point whatsoever it explains how the mattel employes know about barbieland like imagine starting your new job on mattel and the first thing they tell you on orientation is

“yeah barbieland is real and we’ve had incidents in the past with a doll coming into the real world please see page 7 of your employee handbook for reference also if you wander into a random room on the 17th floor and meet a nice old lady don’t mind her it is just the ghost of our founder”

sl-an:

This was my barbenheimer

frownyalfred:

Bruce has the “dad voice” and it’s a shock to every resident of the Manor when he uses it

landrylovesmatcha:

what was i made for?

“ophelia” by john everett millais but it’s barbie and for the sake of this concept let’s pretend that there is in fact water in barbieland